Author: Joan Becker Friedman

Understanding Baby and Child Sleep Cycles

Joan Becker Friedman Baby & Child Health , ,

Variety is the spice of life, but that’s not true when we talk about baby sleep!

As new parents, we want our babies to have predictable sleep patterns. It’s frustrating and exhausting when they don’t. Unfortunately, it’s also normal for newborn sleep to be inconsistent. The best chance you have of catching as many Z’s as possible is to understand baby and child sleep cycles!

Newborn Sleep Cycles

New babies have two stages of sleep. There’s rapid eye movement (REM) sleep and non-rapid eye movement (non-REM) sleep. REM sleep is also known as active sleep, while non-REM is considered quiet sleep. A complete newborn sleep cycle includes both REM and non-REM sleep. During each sleep cycle, newborns spend an equal amount of time in each stage. During active sleep, baby’s eyelids may flutter, their mouth might move, they might twitch and their breathing might speed up. During quiet sleep, your baby remains still. 

Sleep Cycles Change With Your Baby

Between three and six months, babies develop a predictable circadian rhythm. This is when their sleep cycles lengthen to about 45 minutes. By six months, each cycle may be 60 – 75 minutes or longer. During this time, non-REM sleep develops into three stages.

  • Phase I – Very light sleep The eyes are closed. Your baby is relaxed but not quite asleep.
  • Phase II – The heart rate slows down; body temperature decreases and muscles relax.
  • Phase III – Deep sleep

During Phase I and Phase II, baby can wake up easily. During Phase III, or deep sleep, it is harder to wake a baby (or grown up, for that matter!)

Baby and Child Sleep Cycles- They Grow Up So Fast

Throughout childhood, sleep cycles progress to looking more like adult sleep cycles. By the time we reach adulthood, sleep cycles lengthen to 90 – 120 minutes. Adults spend approximately 20% of sleep time in REM sleep, whereas newborns spend 50% of their sleep time in REM sleep.

Using Baby and Child Sleep Knowledge to Get More Sleep

Newborn parents often check on their babies*, see them moving or hear them making noises and think baby is awake! We naturally want to jump in and help soothe baby to sleep. Plus, newborn parents are exhausted and want more sleep- whatever it takes!  

All of that said, the best way to help your baby sleep is understanding that movements and noise in REM sleep are normal. If you can wait to intervene until baby lets out a true cry, your baby has a chance to embark on the next sleep stage independently.

At the end of a sleep cycle, a baby (or an adult) either wakes up or just goes on to the next sleep cycle. Babies who sleep through the night, transition easily from one sleep cycle to the next without waking. Or, they may wake briefly (without you even noticing) and self-soothe back to sleep. This is where sleep associations come into play. If your baby associates falling asleep with holding, rocking, bouncing or feeding, they’ll want your help moving between each sleep cycle. If you’re exhausted, helping your baby learn to connect those sleep cycles gives both of you the gift of more sleep!

*If you find yourself checking your baby’s sleep so much that you can’t sleep when they sleep or it interferes with your functioning, please reach out to your medical team. This may be a sign of a perinatal mental health condition requiring additional support and/or treatment.

Understanding the AAP’s New Safe-Sleep Guidelines

Joan Becker Friedman Baby & Child Health, Baby Sleep, Parenting

Here at Peapod Sleep Consultants we’ve been working hard to digest the American Academy of Pediatrics’ (AAP) new safe-sleep guidelines and recommendations. It’s the first time in SIX years they’ve updated this information, so these new recommendations and clarifications are based on research that’s happened since then and will hopefully help prevent Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS).

At the end of the day, the lead author of the new policy says keep sleep simple. 

“Simple is best. Babies should always sleep alone in a crib or bassinet, on their back, without soft toys, pillows, blankets or other bedding,“ said Dr. Rachel Moon. 

While you may have read the new safe-sleep guidelines, you also might have walked away wondering “what’s new here?” Mostly, these updated suggestions provide more specific guidance to clarify earlier recommendations.

What’s new in the new safe-sleep guidelines?

They’re more specific and they’re meant to clarify the earlier recommendations. Here’s the summary:

  • Try to share your room- NOT your bed- with baby for six months. While some parents may find bed sharing preferable, according to Dr. Rebecca Carline, co-author of the AAP report, said the evidence is clear that bed sharing increases the risk of a baby’s injury or death.
  • Inclined sleepers of any kind are not acceptable for sleep (and the Consumer Product Safety Commission agrees with their new rule banning certain types of inclined sleepers)
  • Swaddling is fine for sleep but should be discontinued with the first signs of rolling over.
  • Avoid weighted blankets, weighted swaddles or weighted sleep sacks.
  • Keep pillows, bumper pads, stuffed animals, blankets or any other types of soft bedding out of baby’s bed.
  • Try not to use car seats, bouncers, strollers, carriers, swings and slings for naps or night sleep. If a baby falls asleep in a car seat, they should be transferred to a crib or bassinet as soon as possible. During the first few months of life, a baby doesn’t necessarily have head or neck strength to keep their airway open in one of these products. 
  • Heart rate monitors and pulse oximeters you can buy in your average baby store are not recommended. The concern is false alarms and that they may provide parents with a false sense of security.

About That Six Month Rooming-In Suggestion

Yes, the guidelines suggest that you keep baby in your room for six months. But, there may be circumstances where it makes sense for your family to move baby to their room sooner. We say this with the knowledge that the greatest risk for SIDS is between one and four months. If you’re so sleep deprived at night that you’re bringing baby into your bed to catch up on sleep, it may be less risky to move baby into their own room than to keep them with you. Before you make any decisions, consult with your pediatrician. 

Returning Safe-Sleep Recommendations

The following safe-sleep guidelines remain part of the AAP’s recommendations:

  • Place your child on their back to sleep for all naps and night sleep.
  • Avoid overheating (68-72 degrees is the sweet spot)
  • Breastfeed or provide expressed human milk for six months or more. Editorial note: Fed is best! Please don’t feel any guilt if breastmilk is not a good choice for your family.
  • Offer your baby a pacifier at sleep times.
  • Avoid smoke exposure, alcohol and illicit drug use.
  • Try to work your baby up to 15 to 30 minutes of daily tummy time each day by seven weeks.

If you’re ever in doubt about a particular product, consult the Consumer Product Safety Commission https://www.cpsc.gov/ or the Juvenile Products Manufacturers Association https://www.jpma.org/. If you have questions about any part of the newly revised guidelines, it’s best to consult with your child’s pediatrician.

Bedtime Changes For Sleep Anxiety

Joan Becker Friedman Baby & Child Health, Common Sleep Challenges, Nighttime Sleep, Toddler Sleep , ,
mother laying with child

“Mommy, lay with me.” 

“Can you hold my hand until I fall asleep?”

“One more hug.”

They’re the sweet bedtime murmurs of your little- or the exhausting demands of a child struggling with sleep anxiety. 

When children show sleep anxiety at bedtime (and they don’t express it during daytime hours) these manifestations- clinginess, procrastination, “one more…”- may be a sign that your child hasn’t mastered the ability to fall asleep independently. These kiddos don’t want you to leave their room because they can’t fall asleep without you. Your child stays on “high alert” each time you try to go. 

Inside your scared sleeper’s body their fears are getting in the way of their sleepiness. 

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Getting on the Same Page About Sleep Training

Joan Becker Friedman Parenting

Sleep training takes a little preparation to make sure it actually works! The first step for two-parent households is getting on the same page that sleep training is needed. We know you’re exhausted, and we know agreeing on anything is harder without sleep. When you’ve tried recommendations from your pediatrician and well-meaning family members and friends, if nothing seems to be working, you might need some outside help! But before you do that, make sure you and your partner agree on handling sleep.

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Popular Baby Sleep Products Banned by New Regulation

Joan Becker Friedman Baby & Child Health, Baby Sleep

On Wednesday, June 2, 2021, the Consumer Products Safety Commission (CPSC) approved a new infant safety regulation. All products intended for infant sleep will be tested to make sure the angle is less than 10 degrees AND they must meet current standards for cribs and bassinets. Neither of these is required of inclined sleepers and similar baby sleep products today.

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You Might Not Need A Baby Monitor

Joan Becker Friedman Baby Sleep, Parenting

Baby monitors have become a must-have for most new parents’ baby registries. They’re great at providing reassurance when you have a new baby. That is a wonderful benefit of this technology! And baby monitors are great if you and your kids are sleeping on different floors or you have a special needs child. But, if your kiddo is in the next room, you might not need a baby monitor.

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Finding the Motivation to Fix Sleep

Joan Becker Friedman Common Sleep Challenges, Parenting

Fussy, cranky, uncooperative….You know when your child is overtired. When you work a full day, take care of the kids, prepare dinner, clean up, do laundry, etc., etc., it may seem impossible to get your kids in bed at an age-appropriate bedtime. Late bedtimes, difficulty falling asleep, night wakings…all of it leads to parental frustration and ultimately, exhaustion for everyone. And who has the motivation to fix sleep issues when you’re tired?

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Recovering From Your Child’s Sleep Disruptions

Joan Becker Friedman Common Sleep Challenges, Nighttime Sleep, Toddler Sleep

When COVID causes nighttime troubles

These years of the pandemic that has disrupted our lives and that of our children. It’s been too long of virtual learning, hybrid learning and in-person learning, for some, all of the above. It’s been challenging to keep track of schedules and maintain flexibility to adapt to the ever-changing COVID guidelines and protocols. Many of us are still in survival mode. You may not be getting much sleep as you try to meet the needs of your kids and the demands of your career and other needs. And your child’s sleep disruptions only make it harder. We can’t help but become a bit lax when it comes to household sleep rules, and now you may be parenting through the results.

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How to Deal With Sleep Regressions

Joan Becker Friedman Baby Sleep, Common Sleep Challenges, Nighttime Sleep, Toddler Sleep ,

Undoubtedly, you’ve heard of sleep regressions. If you’re reading this, chances are you’re experiencing it first hand. The word regression suggests a setback- something abnormal. Unfortunately regressions aren’t abnormal. They are frustrating, exhausting and overwhelming.

Just when you think you have a great sleeper, your great sleeper stops sleeping well. A sleep regression might look like difficulty settling down or falling asleep, nap resistance and night wakings. All of this can lead to overtiredness. In turn, overtiredness can result in fussiness and crankiness. For you and your child. 

Here’s maybe the most important part: sleep regressions usually only last one or two weeks. This will pass.

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